Young Professionals Making A Difference In The World
Men's Rules For Women
My grandfather sent me this little bit of wisdom. Ever since he became computer literate a few years back, my in-box has been flooded daily with all his forwards...Got to love him. But I have to admit the following decoder is dead on balls accurate!
Men's Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down...Finally , the guys' side of the story. We always hear ' the rules ' from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note: these are all numbered '1 ' ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up…you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as hunting, fishing, golfing, or something with wheels.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight. But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
So this is what Baby Boomers are doing with all their free time these days...lol. Thanks, Paps, keep 'em coming.
Comment
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Comment by Camille Hislop on March 1, 2013 at 1:03am -
I agree with almost everything, except for the toilet seat... That should always be put down.
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Comment by Britt Hysen on March 12, 2012 at 4:56pm -
this is so cute and funny!!! i love that they are all numbered 1 lol ...@Kurou, love the picture too!
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Comment by Madison Hart on March 7, 2012 at 8:19am -
Copyright my line? fine...but I get half... no... wait. I get two thirds...oops I've changed my again....
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
Fine. I want it ALL. every last stinking penny of it. Plus your first born. Is that direct enough, Paps & Boomer Crew?
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Comment by Zane Whitman on March 6, 2012 at 3:27pm -
I also think if I end up crying, I'd like that to be acknowledged as it's not on cue.
@Kristin- according to the rules above, that would fall under the 7th #1
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
Not my rules- blame it on Paps and Boomer Crew. lol
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Comment by Zane Whitman on March 6, 2012 at 3:23pm
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that's it...The World According to Paps and Boomer Crew...the title to my next blog! I'm copyrighting it BTW. Thanks, @Madison-you are always so helpful.
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Comment by Kristin Rafferty on March 6, 2012 at 10:54am -
Kurou...that is TOO funny of a picture by the way!
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Comment by Kristin Rafferty on March 6, 2012 at 10:53am
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LOL! I still like a man who knows my toilet seat goes down. I also think if I end up crying, I'd like that to be acknowledged as it's not on cue. I should add to the list even though I'm a female, if you say, "I'm cold", don't expect him to KNOW, "Hey! Shut the door/window please!" He'll just nod and say, "Huh, oh."
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Comment by Kurou Masaki on March 5, 2012 at 11:13pm -
This will explain things a little better.
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Comment by Kelly Wade on March 5, 2012 at 4:46pm -
I could add a few, bud...but why give it all up at once. Paps and Boomer crew...that's funny @Madison.
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Comment by Madison Hart on March 4, 2012 at 2:14pm
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;>
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